Thursday, May 7, 2009
A Mother's Day Wish
Today I agonized over which topic to discuss until I realized that Mother's Day was approaching. Why? Because that day has always been bittersweet. Not because my mother isn't in my life or because distance separates us but because the lines have always been blurred. Mainly, because my mother and I have always battled for as long as I can remember. Didn't matter what it was,there would always be a difference of opinion. Whether it was the outfit I chose to put on or the choice of hairdo I made, my mother was always going to have the last say. That's just who she is. And nothing that I said or thought would ever change that. But after all, didn't she have the right too? She is, in fact, the person that endured countless hours of labor for me to even exist. She is also the person who managed to go from working as a babysitter for myself and other neighborhood kids when I was young only to become a manager of a retail store. And she did this because she separated from my father and had to raise my sisters and I all alone. So whether it was a pair of shoes I needed for a dancing school recital or a ticket to a Broadway show, my mother always made a way. Once again, I say with admiration, doing it all alone and without the kindnesses of any strangers or anyone else. My mom was too proud for that. She was, and is, a pillar of strength. I guess this is where I get my tenacious spirit, always managing to bounce back from difficult situations. Therefore, this year, I'll take time out to thank my mom for all the arguments, the birthday wishes, the tears she made me shed from harsh words, the disappointments we shared together, the long talks, the heated exchanges we've had and last but not least the times we missed out on when both of us chose not to speak. Why? Because all of these things taught me how to be a much better person, and a much better woman than I'd ever hoped to be. On this day I'll push aside my judgement of the choices she made on how to raise me, and replace them with gratitude and appreciation simply because she gave me "life." In dew season maybe, just maybe, we'll all see the light.